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Jealous Wife

CD Knowles 9 months ago

Dear Knowles,

I have a really bad problem. My best friend since childhood is after my husband. How do I know this? I see the way she looks at him, all goo goo eyes. She was my maid of honor when we married two years ago and I think she had a crush on him then. She herself constantly has  new boyfriends, but is still unmarried. I can’t deny that she’s very pretty and always has guys at her beck and call, but I don’t want her going after my guy. She lives in the same neighborhood as us and comes over all the time, uninvited. I’ve returned from work to find her snuggled on the couch next to my husband, practically in his lap. He’ll tell me nothing’s going on and I believe him — he’s a good guy — but the situation is really uncomfortable. I’ve told her in no uncertain terms to back off, and what she does in response is bat her phoney eyelashes and tell me I’ve always had a vivid imagination. “I’d never do anything to jeopardize your marriage,” she’ll say. Yeah, right. “You know Jimmy (my husband) and I are just good friends.” As I said, I trust my husband, but not Christie, my childhood friend, who’ll show up in the shortest skirts you’ve ever seen and sit on the couch with her legs parted and her panties showing. She wears lots of makeup when she comes to our house, and she’s always touching my husband, putting her hand on his arm or the back of his neck and whispering little secrets in his ear. It makes me just livid and I feel powerless to do anything because then I’ll seem like a jealous fool. She has a reputation for going after guys who are taken and ditching them once she’s succeeded in separating them from their wives or girlfriends. Can you help me please? I was friends with her through high school, but now I’m done and don’t know how to get rid of her.

Jealous Wife


Dear Jealous Wife,

Here’s what you should do:

  1. Break with your girlfriend and tell her in no uncertain terms that you don’t want to see her again and don’t ever want her in your house
  2. Talk with your husband about the situation. Make sure he agrees to honor your decision that you, as a couple, will no longer have a relationship with the girl
  3. Talk to other women burned by her and see how they’ve handled it
  4. Stick with your decision if you want to avoid heartache

If you can’t do any of the things on this list, you’re wasting my time and everyone else’s.

Good Luck,

CD Knowles






It won’t get any better. At this time, there is no cure for it. All you can do is keep taking out the trash. As a child, I was unable to stop my hoarding mother. Read Coming Clean by Kimberly Rae Miller and Stuff by Randy Frost and Gail Sleketee. At a minimum, keep your own place. The hoarder will drive you out.
– D.N.
I dated a brilliant and wonderful world traveler and art collector that was one. We were together for year and he was my last Minnesota boyfriend. He was highly respected and a wonderful man but I could not live that way. He was totally unwilling to deal with that and you can’t make someone. So we broke up. He sold about $1 million of Chinese antiquities to MIA.
– N.G.

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Disclaimer: CD Knowles is not a doctor or psychotherapist. Any opinions expressed on Knowles Knows are just that — opinions.